*Fanfiction
English
Hey!Say!Jump
OneShot
PG-13
Short Story
December Miracle
Summary: Life is a miracle as it is.
Group/pairing: Takaki/Yaotome
Word Count: 2043
Rating: Bordering PG
Disclaimer: I do not own people... Hey!Say!Jump! belong to themselves and their professional self belongs to Johnny's Entertainment
Notes: This is my first H!S!J! fic, characterization might not be spot on... I'm still trying to familiarise myself with the little 'gummybears'... and this fiction is unbeta-ed
From where I stand life seemed to be a gift. Or rather a miracle. The words ran through his head over and over like a broken record player that can only play the one line he wished he had never read the night before. He was not sure himself what was the purpose for him to open the little book that his friend called a diary. They had no secrets between them. They had nothing to hide from each other. Yet somehow the urge to know what was written in the little bluish book was so hard to resist.
Life. He smirked at the thought of the word itself. What is life? There was a time he thought he would just rather die than living the fake life he had been living all these time. He kept thinking to himself what was going to turn out of him if he kept doing what he was doing. Was his life worth living?
“It would be nice if you told me that you wanted to read the book you know.” Yaotome who came from the mist said as he took a seat directly in front of him. “And it would be nicer if you don’t open it at all.” He said with a pouty face. “You don’t know what you might find in that book.”
Takaki forced himself to a sitting position. “How long have you been in here?” He questioned the other boy. He wonders how on earth did the clumsiest boy on earth came into his room without him even hearing a noise.
“Long enough to know that you are worried about something.” Yaotome answered. “Look if it’s because of the book, It’s nothing really. I call it a diary because I don’t want the little ones to see the content of it. It’s more of a lyrics book really.” He said seriously. Yaotome was never serious. Not once he had seen the younger boy being serious. He was one of the little ones.
“Are you angry? Because I read that book?” Takaki questioned. Yaotome just smirked and shook his head. “What does it mean?” He asked. “What does life is a miracle means?”
A short laugh escaped from Yaotome’s calm expression. “I’m not angry.” He said monotonically. Takaki was not sure was it the tone or was it Yaotome’s expression that makes him feel guilty for even peeking at the contents of the book.
Yaotome let out a sigh as he stood up. “Wait.” Takaki spoke.
“I’m taking the book. What’s with you?” Yaotome questioned. Takaki just shook his head. “It means what everyone thinks it means. Life itself is a miracle, isn’t it. Being alive, being able to breathe and being able to speak and walk and all these little things we take for granted every minute, no, every second of the day. These are little miracles that make us what we are.” He said as he handed the little book to Takaki. “Read all you want. I don’t mind.”
Takaki took the book yet he could not bring himself to open it. “I really didn’t mean to you know. I was just curious.” He said as he sat the book on the table in front of them. Yaotome took the book and opened it to almost the middle of the book.
“Actually I began writing in this book only quite recently. The line you read was my first one. That was the reason for the page to be marked. This book belongs to the girl I met during my social work at the hospital.” Yaotome said. “I was planning to bring all of you to meet her one day. But because of the wait, I could not fulfill her last wish.” He said as he flipped the book to where another bookmark was placed.
‘Pain does not stop it. Hurt and anger don't stop it. Despair will definitely not stop it. What stop life is the will to live.’ The words were written with a really bad handwriting. Like someone who was suppressing pain. Yet her words were trying to reflect the positive energy in her. ‘Sometime when the all you see is darkness, you forget about the little glints of little sparkling dust around you.”
“She was younger than Ryu-chan is now when she wrote these.” Yaotome’s eyes were glassy as he spoke. The depth of his voice was changing. “She is the reason I am still here you know.” He said with a heavy sigh. “But that is all in the past.” She said as he forced his lips to curve into a smile.
Takaki kept quiet. He was not used to the intensity that was building in the room. Not with Yaotome. His eyes could not avert from the book yet he hadn’t the strength to open and read the substances contained in the little book. “Was she special?” He asked suddenly.
Yaotome sucked in a deep breath contemplating his answer before vocalizing them. “In a way.” He said carefully. “Like I said it’s all passed. All we have now is the present and the future that we sculpt ourselves.”
Takaki was lost again. He didn’t know the man in front of him. He never met this man before in his life. It was then he realized that everyone had another side in their life. The constantly smiling and silly Yaotome too had a serious and mysterious side in him. Gradually he gained his strength and flipped the book absently.
The carving of the pen was in a different hue. The vibe of the writing curve was also different. It was almost like a person in despair. Yet she was trying to pull herself out of the pain into the positive light. ‘Dying is certainly not easy. But when the path of life becomes uncertain, living is much harder to endure.’
Like a disease, he threw the book on the table. Yaotome turned and faced the disturbed boy in front of him. Takaki was the kind of person that was readable. At least to him, he was. Something was really bothering him. “What are you trying to do exactly?” Takaki voiced out his confusion.
“We grew up together, Yuya. Though at times we are worlds apart, we shared the same path. We shared the same hurt and we’ve been through the same pain. She showed me that living is the only way to get through the worst pain.” Yaotome said before exiting the room.
Takaki was not sure what hit him, but his head felt heavy and he could not think straight. His whole body seemed frozen. He looked down to his cold trembling hand. The guilt of wanting to end his own life. The guilt of never considering others in his judgments and the guilt of betraying the trust of his own friend was overbearing for him. In his mind, he could not even differentiate between the world of dreams and reality anymore.
“Yuya-kun hold on just a little while longer. Just hold on.” The calming voice said to him. “Hold on to my voice. Don’t let go of the light.” The voice was familiar yet he could not place the voice to a face. The little warm hand was holding him tight. “Yuya-kun. Hold on.” He spoke again before he let go.
“The only way to fight the pain is to live.” He heard another voice spoke to him.
“Hikaru?” Was the only thing he could barely whisper.
“He’s awake.” A chorus of voice spoke making his head hurts. He fought the darkness to find the light that he believes in that was there. The string of voices that helped him through the hardest time he had been through. The string of voices that pulled him out of the deepest well he had fallen into. The string of voices that made up from the melodic voice of the people he had called his friends. The one he had grew up and felt the same pain and went through the same hell he did.
The little dust of glitter formed a bright light in front of him. The light hurts his eyes yet, the pain was nothing compared to the pain he knew his friends was feeling. The pain of not knowing. “Hikaru, was she real?” Was the first thing that he could think of. Yaotome looked away. “It was not a dream, was it? The conversation we had, it was not a dream was it?” He demanded.
“It wasn’t. Let’s just forget about it if this is how you are going to react to it.” Yaotome said as he stood up and began to walk away.
“I don’t remember anything. I remember the conversation we had and that was it.” Takaki spoke.
Yaotome just smirked and walked away. “You shouldn’t have opened it in the first place you know.” Yabu chirped in while the younger ones were shooed out. The last one to go out of the door was Chinen. He had a sad smile on his innocent face. He was one of the pure ones amongst them.
“I remember reading a few pages and had a talk with him. Then I could not remember a thing after that.” Takaki said seriously as he faced Yabu. “Tell me what have I done this time?” His voice practically begging at the taller boy.
“I read the book too. When you were out cold, I read the book till the part that you stopped.” Yabu started. “Somehow after Hikaru explained about her to you, you mocked him and laughed at him. I have never seen him so angry before. All he did was pushed you, when you fell and did not wake up, he was the most scared. You meant that much to him, your friendship is that valuable to him.”
‘December miracle
Never had I seen one that values friendship to the point that one’s feeling and pain is put aside just to see the others happy. It has been a year since I met him. He’s always wearing a smile even though he was bearing pain, even when he was bearing sorrow and when he was bearing hurt. The only time I saw his frown was when he told me that his friend was hurt. He is my December miracle. He is Yaotome Hikaru. He is the smiling hero that gave me strength, strength to this weakening body. Yaotome-kun, Arigatou.’
“Hikaru.” Takaki called from the door frame, half expecting the silly boy to smile back. Instead, Yaotome just stood up and tries to get away from him. “Hikaru, whatever I said, whatever I did, I don’t remember one bit. I’m really sorry.” He said.
Like a marvel struck him, Yaotome turned. “You never apologized to anyone.” Yaotome said in a whispery voice. “Not like that. Like it came from your heart and not because of you need to do it.” He said slightly in awe.
“I really am sorry. I don’t remember a thing.” Takaki replied. “What was it that makes you so angry. You said you weren’t angry at me for looking at the book.” He questioned.
“You said, ‘Thank you for believing in all the lies and the fakeness that you have worn all these time. The smiled you had to wear every day and the bogus happiness that we all brought together.’ If those were all fake, that means our friendship is fake too.” Yaotome reasoned. “I’m sorry if we made you feel as if you have to live in a fake world with fake feelings. The least you could do is think about the younger kids. They are still fragile, their emotion is still delicate.”
It struck him that Yaotome was not angry at him for saying those things to him. He was never angry at him reading the little book. He was angry because the little ones were hurt. He was angry for the reason that Takaki was hurt and not tell anyone about it. Although he may seem silly on the outside and carelessly happy-go-lucky, the real Yaotome that was hiding behind the smile was really what had held them together all those painful years through the hell that they had been together.
Group/pairing: Takaki/Yaotome
Word Count: 2043
Rating: Bordering PG
Disclaimer: I do not own people... Hey!Say!Jump! belong to themselves and their professional self belongs to Johnny's Entertainment
Prompt: #41 - December
Notes: This is my first H!S!J! fic, characterization might not be spot on... I'm still trying to familiarise myself with the little 'gummybears'... and this fiction is unbeta-ed
From where I stand life seemed to be a gift. Or rather a miracle. The words ran through his head over and over like a broken record player that can only play the one line he wished he had never read the night before. He was not sure himself what was the purpose for him to open the little book that his friend called a diary. They had no secrets between them. They had nothing to hide from each other. Yet somehow the urge to know what was written in the little bluish book was so hard to resist.
Life. He smirked at the thought of the word itself. What is life? There was a time he thought he would just rather die than living the fake life he had been living all these time. He kept thinking to himself what was going to turn out of him if he kept doing what he was doing. Was his life worth living?
“It would be nice if you told me that you wanted to read the book you know.” Yaotome who came from the mist said as he took a seat directly in front of him. “And it would be nicer if you don’t open it at all.” He said with a pouty face. “You don’t know what you might find in that book.”
Takaki forced himself to a sitting position. “How long have you been in here?” He questioned the other boy. He wonders how on earth did the clumsiest boy on earth came into his room without him even hearing a noise.
“Long enough to know that you are worried about something.” Yaotome answered. “Look if it’s because of the book, It’s nothing really. I call it a diary because I don’t want the little ones to see the content of it. It’s more of a lyrics book really.” He said seriously. Yaotome was never serious. Not once he had seen the younger boy being serious. He was one of the little ones.
“Are you angry? Because I read that book?” Takaki questioned. Yaotome just smirked and shook his head. “What does it mean?” He asked. “What does life is a miracle means?”
A short laugh escaped from Yaotome’s calm expression. “I’m not angry.” He said monotonically. Takaki was not sure was it the tone or was it Yaotome’s expression that makes him feel guilty for even peeking at the contents of the book.
Yaotome let out a sigh as he stood up. “Wait.” Takaki spoke.
“I’m taking the book. What’s with you?” Yaotome questioned. Takaki just shook his head. “It means what everyone thinks it means. Life itself is a miracle, isn’t it. Being alive, being able to breathe and being able to speak and walk and all these little things we take for granted every minute, no, every second of the day. These are little miracles that make us what we are.” He said as he handed the little book to Takaki. “Read all you want. I don’t mind.”
Takaki took the book yet he could not bring himself to open it. “I really didn’t mean to you know. I was just curious.” He said as he sat the book on the table in front of them. Yaotome took the book and opened it to almost the middle of the book.
“Actually I began writing in this book only quite recently. The line you read was my first one. That was the reason for the page to be marked. This book belongs to the girl I met during my social work at the hospital.” Yaotome said. “I was planning to bring all of you to meet her one day. But because of the wait, I could not fulfill her last wish.” He said as he flipped the book to where another bookmark was placed.
‘Pain does not stop it. Hurt and anger don't stop it. Despair will definitely not stop it. What stop life is the will to live.’ The words were written with a really bad handwriting. Like someone who was suppressing pain. Yet her words were trying to reflect the positive energy in her. ‘Sometime when the all you see is darkness, you forget about the little glints of little sparkling dust around you.”
“She was younger than Ryu-chan is now when she wrote these.” Yaotome’s eyes were glassy as he spoke. The depth of his voice was changing. “She is the reason I am still here you know.” He said with a heavy sigh. “But that is all in the past.” She said as he forced his lips to curve into a smile.
Takaki kept quiet. He was not used to the intensity that was building in the room. Not with Yaotome. His eyes could not avert from the book yet he hadn’t the strength to open and read the substances contained in the little book. “Was she special?” He asked suddenly.
Yaotome sucked in a deep breath contemplating his answer before vocalizing them. “In a way.” He said carefully. “Like I said it’s all passed. All we have now is the present and the future that we sculpt ourselves.”
Takaki was lost again. He didn’t know the man in front of him. He never met this man before in his life. It was then he realized that everyone had another side in their life. The constantly smiling and silly Yaotome too had a serious and mysterious side in him. Gradually he gained his strength and flipped the book absently.
The carving of the pen was in a different hue. The vibe of the writing curve was also different. It was almost like a person in despair. Yet she was trying to pull herself out of the pain into the positive light. ‘Dying is certainly not easy. But when the path of life becomes uncertain, living is much harder to endure.’
Like a disease, he threw the book on the table. Yaotome turned and faced the disturbed boy in front of him. Takaki was the kind of person that was readable. At least to him, he was. Something was really bothering him. “What are you trying to do exactly?” Takaki voiced out his confusion.
“We grew up together, Yuya. Though at times we are worlds apart, we shared the same path. We shared the same hurt and we’ve been through the same pain. She showed me that living is the only way to get through the worst pain.” Yaotome said before exiting the room.
Takaki was not sure what hit him, but his head felt heavy and he could not think straight. His whole body seemed frozen. He looked down to his cold trembling hand. The guilt of wanting to end his own life. The guilt of never considering others in his judgments and the guilt of betraying the trust of his own friend was overbearing for him. In his mind, he could not even differentiate between the world of dreams and reality anymore.
“Yuya-kun hold on just a little while longer. Just hold on.” The calming voice said to him. “Hold on to my voice. Don’t let go of the light.” The voice was familiar yet he could not place the voice to a face. The little warm hand was holding him tight. “Yuya-kun. Hold on.” He spoke again before he let go.
“The only way to fight the pain is to live.” He heard another voice spoke to him.
“Hikaru?” Was the only thing he could barely whisper.
“He’s awake.” A chorus of voice spoke making his head hurts. He fought the darkness to find the light that he believes in that was there. The string of voices that helped him through the hardest time he had been through. The string of voices that pulled him out of the deepest well he had fallen into. The string of voices that made up from the melodic voice of the people he had called his friends. The one he had grew up and felt the same pain and went through the same hell he did.
The little dust of glitter formed a bright light in front of him. The light hurts his eyes yet, the pain was nothing compared to the pain he knew his friends was feeling. The pain of not knowing. “Hikaru, was she real?” Was the first thing that he could think of. Yaotome looked away. “It was not a dream, was it? The conversation we had, it was not a dream was it?” He demanded.
“It wasn’t. Let’s just forget about it if this is how you are going to react to it.” Yaotome said as he stood up and began to walk away.
“I don’t remember anything. I remember the conversation we had and that was it.” Takaki spoke.
Yaotome just smirked and walked away. “You shouldn’t have opened it in the first place you know.” Yabu chirped in while the younger ones were shooed out. The last one to go out of the door was Chinen. He had a sad smile on his innocent face. He was one of the pure ones amongst them.
“I remember reading a few pages and had a talk with him. Then I could not remember a thing after that.” Takaki said seriously as he faced Yabu. “Tell me what have I done this time?” His voice practically begging at the taller boy.
“I read the book too. When you were out cold, I read the book till the part that you stopped.” Yabu started. “Somehow after Hikaru explained about her to you, you mocked him and laughed at him. I have never seen him so angry before. All he did was pushed you, when you fell and did not wake up, he was the most scared. You meant that much to him, your friendship is that valuable to him.”
‘December miracle
Never had I seen one that values friendship to the point that one’s feeling and pain is put aside just to see the others happy. It has been a year since I met him. He’s always wearing a smile even though he was bearing pain, even when he was bearing sorrow and when he was bearing hurt. The only time I saw his frown was when he told me that his friend was hurt. He is my December miracle. He is Yaotome Hikaru. He is the smiling hero that gave me strength, strength to this weakening body. Yaotome-kun, Arigatou.’
“Hikaru.” Takaki called from the door frame, half expecting the silly boy to smile back. Instead, Yaotome just stood up and tries to get away from him. “Hikaru, whatever I said, whatever I did, I don’t remember one bit. I’m really sorry.” He said.
Like a marvel struck him, Yaotome turned. “You never apologized to anyone.” Yaotome said in a whispery voice. “Not like that. Like it came from your heart and not because of you need to do it.” He said slightly in awe.
“I really am sorry. I don’t remember a thing.” Takaki replied. “What was it that makes you so angry. You said you weren’t angry at me for looking at the book.” He questioned.
“You said, ‘Thank you for believing in all the lies and the fakeness that you have worn all these time. The smiled you had to wear every day and the bogus happiness that we all brought together.’ If those were all fake, that means our friendship is fake too.” Yaotome reasoned. “I’m sorry if we made you feel as if you have to live in a fake world with fake feelings. The least you could do is think about the younger kids. They are still fragile, their emotion is still delicate.”
It struck him that Yaotome was not angry at him for saying those things to him. He was never angry at him reading the little book. He was angry because the little ones were hurt. He was angry for the reason that Takaki was hurt and not tell anyone about it. Although he may seem silly on the outside and carelessly happy-go-lucky, the real Yaotome that was hiding behind the smile was really what had held them together all those painful years through the hell that they had been together.
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